Phaux's Closing Thoughts, Part 1

I am sitting in seatac airport with five'ish hours to go until I liftoff for home, and want to record some thoughts while they are fresh and juicy. First off, Zoo is a GREAT road mate. Words cannot express his huge contribution to the road trips being extraordinary, but I'll give it a shot..

He is unflinching about being alive and living life his way. I have great respect for him, even when I disagree. His travel is experience is deep, so having him along adds a layer of comfort, especially when he says, "Can we drive down on that iced over river?"  (unnamed rental car company, please do not read this). His encouragement of me and other people to go outside their boundaries and live a little makes life interesting and fun. There's so much more, but my point is sincerely that I appreciate you, Zoo. Thanks for the miles and the smiles, dude.

Places #1 Portland #2 Banff  #3 Vancouver 

I could move to Portland tomorrow and be a very happy man. I will visit Banff many times in the future. And Vancouver is a damn cool city.

Highlights Kennedy School - just plain awesome The Doug Fir and Rontoms are great bars with fun people. Always wanted to drink at the Doug Fir and I learned that the Indie Music scene in Portland is great at Rontoms. My beautiful skull Banff, the beautiful Best Road Biggest Unanswered Question Whistler Village, BC

Panoramas

Favorite People Photo  

Best Breakfast - Voula's (Sorry, Portland!) Best Lunch - St. James Gate Gangers and Mash Best Dinner - Tie between Slo Bar (burger) in Portland and Grizzly House (fondue) in Banff

Growth Every single road trip we make includes opportunities taken to plant seeds, leave room for gestation and let the new rear its head. On this trip, I was a lot more emotionally stable than prior trips, so instead my personal growth included being a bit more "one of the guys." My life prior to this didn't really have opportunity to ever be a wingman, play in bars, flirt outrageously, etc. It was a fairly "normal" path towards the American Dream of having the house, marriage and kids. Now I am living a new bachelor life and finding out that not only do I like being alone, but I also like learning more about what I may like in a relationship with each new gal with whom I spend a little time.

The result? I still believe in love and fidelity in a committed relationship. But it's not something I'll die over if I don't get it now... In the meantime I'm having fun.

As for Zoo, I know he had his own thoughts gestating during the trip. I won't presume to comment on them, but I do think they are going to stay underground for some more nutrients and water in the dark.

On another topic, I have some more thoughts about authenticity. It is a slight paradox that I choose to use a pseudonym on this site, but firmly believe in transparency and authenticity. This is brought into relief by one of Zoo's posts where during that evening I gave out personal information, but not info about this site. It turned out for the best, because the fun-poking from Zoo could be hurtful should the site be found. Nothing terrible, just not entirely nice. And here is the crux of the matter... What Zoo posts is not my responsibility, but I do share the site with him. Do I reveal what he posts by revealing the site, or do I let it pass? That question lies unanswered at present. So I also have something that needs more time to grow before I can make a decision.

It's also apparent that I am still learning the fine art (snicker) of being a wingman. It's foreign to me, and my beliefs. In parallel, I also believe that it's far easier to condemn something without every trying it. Greater understanding comes with experience. Easier said, I'll try anything once. In this case, if everyone is out to have a good time then it's a part of the "game." My gut feeling is that I am far too sincere to be a wingman. ;)

Compare to before RT4

Biggest personal disappointment: Ummm... being a little naive about 'signals'

2nd biggest personal disappointment: Not actually engaging in deliberate Sentography, only holistic.

Biggest personal success: Frankly, enjoying myself with unfamiliar women on short notice. I've been removed from that world for a long time... I usually work into relationships over a long period of time. Bars and dating are almost a foreign language to me.

Wrapup Every road trip is a potent reminder that we have to choose to enjoy our days, not wait for enjoyment to find you. Make the things you want happen, but don't expect to be able to plan every road between here and what you want, leave that to chance - it's more fun that way.

And finally, get yourself a mohawk. It's the tits.

Day 10: Spammer's Closing Thoughts, Part 1

Social spamming was hella fun.

Taking - no - MAKING time to have a road trip with Zoo Broker was one of the best decisions I have made this year, and let me tell you folks, it's been a year for decisions. I so very enjoyed myself that it is hard to clearly explain. Perhaps all of the posts we made for you (well, for us really) will, in total, represent an experience that mirrors my path in life. Deliberately unplanned, but pursued with enthusiastic vigor.

Full entry after the jump.

If you take a peek at my opening musings, you'll find that I put forth some goals for the trip. Let's see how I did:

• Uncertain destinations (YES)
• Lots of photo-ops (YES)
• Some ridiculously inebrious evenings (YES)
• Perhaps double mileage versus previous trips (3,200 miles)
• Meaningful, probing conversation (YES, IN PLENITUDES)
• Insights (YES, WILL EXPAND ON THIS)
• Glee (YES)
• New people with interesting stories weaving into ours (YES, SEE BLOG)
• Potentially embarrassing moments (YES, SOME NOT SHARED WITH THE PUBLIC)
• Incredible discoveries only found via an open mind and no agenda (YES, SEE HERE & HERE)
• Deep, satisfying exhaustion (YES, TOOK A NAP YESTERDAY)

Do you achieve all your goals? I am not mystified at all that I did. I chose my priorities and focused on them. Everything else fell into place alongside this journey because I have learned (and practice) that you have to focus on the things you can control, and let everything else take care of itself.

Here is the wonderful part... Now I get to set NEW goals. Yes, exciting! I do already have some big plans involving some art, and am ready to jump on that immediately, as well as getting back to a healthy diet (big wink).

As for Zoo Broker, he has been the finest friend I could ask for. Exciting, sharing, generous, thoughtful, encouraging, brazen, inspiring and made me laugh until I cried more than a few times.

Let me share some insights that found me while on this epic journey.

People are generally the same, no matter where you go. To be specific, there are so many indiviual people with different goals and dreams (or dreads), that an generality by region is impossible. Each person you meet is full of potential. Some are more exceptional, and I think this is because they also have a keen interest in life.

America is diverse and wonderful. From the seediest piss-smelling alleys to the majestic and barren desert mountain ranges, it is a composition of amazing things. I love it all. Juxtaposition is the key. I recently went to an Edward Tufte seminar and he states that presenting data without comparison is a meager meal. In this case, seeing the smallest of towns (population 16) to the big metropolises, the plains to the Rockies, the desert to the forest gave me a grand scale for comparison. It's within these differences that lie the opportunity for gratitude, and I am very grateful to have learned more about my country.

I knew this already, but it has been reinforced during this trip: If you do not make time to do the things you love, you may never do them. Just change your priorities.

Being selfish is not a bad thing. After all, who is more important in this world than yourself? I had an interesting conversation with a mostly drunk architect last night and brought up my favorite question (for architects), "Have you read THE FOUNDTAINHEAD?" LOLz, it realy gets some of them going. I see that book as having lots of people acting on the beliefs surrounding "being selfish". Exercising your personal right to choose happiness for yourself before choosing it for other people is what I choose. In general, America sees selfish as a very negative word. I do not. I will always choose my happiness first. This does, however, go hand in hand with the belief that I treat the world as I want to be treated. That is harmony.

Doing unplanned things is one of the best ways to learn something you do not know. It sounds so obvious, but you won't know what Imean until you do it. Why re-learn things you know? Life is toooooo short.

Take the time to tell other people that you like your life. It helps the world become a better place when people know that happiness is out there...

As Zoo Broker repeatedly says, "the opportunity never taken is something that will never happen. It's always better to do it, than not do it." You only get one chance (that we know of) here and now. Do something you like with it.

--SpamZalot